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10.04.2014

Features

Kingdom of Thrones

Rage against the latrine? Not anymore. While Warsaw’s toilets used to be bog standard, and in some cases downright crap, the city has come a long way when it comes to its facilities. In no order whatsoever, we present you the pick of the bunch and the top of the plops…

Not long back the toilets of Dworzec Centralna weren’t a place you’d hang around in – not unless you wanted to be propositioned by weird old blokes wanting a bit of hanky panky.

But part of the station’s zł. 50 million revamp also included new-look toilets supplied by Dutch firm 2theloo. Incorporating an inventive, guerilla design, the results are magnificent as proved by the pics above and to the left.

Nearby, feeling on top of the world comes naturally at the super lux Pure Sky Club (pictured below), Poland’s top private members club. And the five star treatment extends all the way to the toilets which offer stunning views of downtown – bring a telescope for a spot of star gazing!

Incredible Cześć (Grzybowska 2) has emerged as one of the best little bars out there – their selection of British cider is peerless, and ensures plenty of repeat visits to their Space Invaders toilet. 3D or three pee, you ask…

Cult Chwila (Ogrodowa 31/35) looks rugged and rough about the edges, but there’s more to this boho haunt than banging live music and arty individuals. Finding the subterranean toilet is an adventure in itself, with your exploration of the dank, dark catacombs eventually rewarded by a barmy W.C. layered with hundreds of magazine cuttings.

The brilliant Spiskowcy Rozkoszy (ul. Żurawia 47) is one of the great unsung secrets of Warsaw, with a selection of beer to rival the best. And the toilets are pretty smart as well: upstairs, find a strange cubby hole seemingly built into a pre-war fireplace.

Downstairs, look for The Blue Loo (pictured left), a psychedelic affair with calming, pulsating lights that have you thinking that your last beer was spiked.

Finally, there’s Secado (ul. Marszałkowska 66), whose facilities come lined with images of muscly hunks (for the ladies), and in the gents: leering, mocking women who question your manhood. Ladies, please…

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